Dear Fanfiction
by Awaiting Inspiration
Summary: The total drama cast writes letter to Fanfiction, each other, and pretty much anyone! And hey, you can even send in letters too! Warning: You may lose a few braincells.
1. Ain't No Murderer

**Another comedy story that I decided to make for my own amusement. Warning: You may lose a few braincells just be reading this. **

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

Thank you all for your support. I mean, just thank you.

Gothie and Oger deserve to be hated, but I just wanted to make something clear:

I. WOULDN'T. KILL. THEM.

I'm no murderer!

Stop making me a psychopath before I call my lawyers and sue all of you!

And that goes for the people who made me pregnant too! I'd never do the deed with...Duncan... (shivers)

Sincerely, Courtney

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><p><strong>As a side note: If you made one of these stories, this isn't a way to bash any of you. This is just for my amusement.<strong>


	2. No NoCo

**I think we all adore this couple.**

Noah is normal writing,_ and Cody is italics._

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

We are not gay.

_I like Gwen, if you guys haven't been watching the show._

I will never have sex, kiss, hug, snuggle, or make out with Cody or any other boy for that matter.

_I want to snuggle with GWEN!_

Shut up, no one cares.

_Mean..._

Anyway, it was an ACCIDENTAL kiss on the EAR. And you guys make and entire fandom out of that?

Sincerely, Noah and Cody

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><p><strong>Not the best.<strong>


	3. LeDunca? Puhlease

**I'm /attempting/ to keep Leshawna in character here...**

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

WHY, in all that is holy in this world, WOULD I LIKE DANGER BOY?

I come on here, expectin some sweet stories about me and my Sugar Baby, but I see stories about me and that green-haired-two-timing-chicken-legged-devil.

And you guys say he's hot?

Please.

And now Harold won't leave me alone, cause he thinks that boys been gettin some, WHICH HE AIN'T. I know no one can resist the luciousness that is Leshawna, but if yall want me to like that criminal, IT AIN'T HAPPENIN!

Sincerely, Leshawna

P.S.: I only said 'I'm all that and a bag of chips' ONCE. DON'T OVERUSE IT.

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><p><strong>Gotta love raging!Leshawna. <strong>

**You guys can give me ideas if you want, you know :)**


	4. I'm Sorry

**I've decided to give Gwen a little love here, and do something that I wanted to see her do on TDWT ever since the Gwuncan kiss. **

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><p>Dear Courtney,<p>

I'm sorry.

I mean it, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for kissing your boyfriend, for acting like I didn't have any regrets, for making a fool out of you, for EVERYTHING.

He still cares about you. I'm sure he likes me, but not like he still likes you.

I don't regret kissing him (you were always right; I've liked him ever since Season two), but I'm not sure how to get your trust back.

I don't deserve it.

But I'm sorry.

I mean it.

Sincerely, Gwen

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><p>Dear Gwen,<p>

Yeah, okay.

I'm _so_ sure.

Sincerely, Courtney

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><p><strong>...and leave it to Courtney to not accept the apology. Don't get me wrong, love Court, but hey, I wouldn't forgive Gwen either. And that's saying something, because I forgave my dad for dropping my hamster and causing him to go blind. <strong>

**...Yeah...**


	5. Not Abusive

**I think this topic needs adressing...**

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

What is wrong with you people?

I AM NOT ABUSIVE!

Okay, maybe a bit obsessive, but not abusive!

I'd never hit Gwen with anything! Or smack her!

What the freak is wrong with you people?

Does hurting my feelings and depicting me as a abusive man get you going?

Sincerely, Trent

P.S.: Duncan is giving me the evil eye too! THANKS A LOT.

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><p><strong>Oh Trent.<strong>


	6. Duncan Does Not Approve

**Teehee, adding a little Duncney fluff into the mix. Because overprotective!Duncan wins.**

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

Okay, so Geoff was telling me about this site, and I have to say, you all seem to be kinda...fond of me.

Which is awesome, because I _am_ sexy.

But there is one thing I have to point out:

DO NOT PUT ME WITH HAROLD.

Putting me with Trent is enough torture, but then you guys put me with...that?

I like the smut between me and Gwen, but between me and that ginger-nerdy-gangsta-wannabe?

It gives me nightmares.

Sincerely, Duncan

P.S.: You guys can make me as bad as you want, put me with anyone besides Harold, but if you put Courtney with anyone else...

I'll murder you in your sleep.

Not because I still like her!

Because...urgh! Never mind.

But I'm serious.

I will.

I swear it.

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><p><strong>Does Duncan still care? *le gasp*<strong>


	7. He Needs Love

**An idea popped in my head after looking at another story, so I've decided to give this guy some love.**

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

Do you guys hate me or something?

Why do you think a girl who can't even remember her boyfriend is funny?

And why do you guys pair me with Alejandro?

I'm not gay!

Sincerely, Tyler

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><p><strong>I, personally, love Tyler. He and Noah were epic comic reliefs in TDWT, and Cody, but he had that stupid Sierra plotline, so...<strong>

**And I think Tindsay wins. **

**It's just adorable.**


	8. NoahxNo One

**I just noticed how many girls (and guys) Noah is paired up with. **

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

I will love you forever if you pair me with no one.

STOP PAIRING ME WITH RANDOM PEOPLE!

Sincerely, Noah

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><p><strong>Oh Noah. Though the beginning does seem a little OOC to me...<strong>


	9. Attack of the Fangirls

**Maybe a little interaction with Cody and the fangirls...?**

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

I'm starting to think that you guys are just a worse breed of Sierra's.

Sincerely, Cody

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><p>Dear Cody,<p>

You're just lucky that we haven't found a way to get on the show.

But once we do, Sierra get's IT.

Sincerely, All the Cody Fangirls of the World

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><p>Dear Fangirls,<p>

I'm so scared.

Sincerely, Cody

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><p><strong>We all know that if we found a way to get onto the Jumbo Jet, Sierra WOULD get it.<strong>


	10. We Are RAGING

**I'm still mad at Total Drama for breaking up all of the good couples. **

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><p>Dear Total Drama,<p>

You better make the good couples get back together.

We still haven't forgiven you for breaking up Gwent, Duncney, Ozzy, and Harshawna.

If Gidgette or Tindsay go, than we will FIND YOU.

Sincerely, Raging Fans

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><p><strong>I know that I will hunt them DOWN.<strong>


	11. Deal With It

**A request from a Gwuncan lover. **

**I don't have a problem with DxG, I like that couple too, but I'm more of a DxC lover. Juuust letting everyone know.**

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><p>Dear Trent,<p>

We only make you abusive because it gets our stories going.

DEAL WITH IT.

Sincerely, DxG fans

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><p><strong>Not long, but I like it. Short and gets to the point. <strong>

**I mean, there's some stories where Abusive!Trent comes out of nowhere, and he's terribly OOC, but there's others where I can actually see that he's not so out of character.**


	12. Harold vs Duncan

**A little Harold and Duncan war always makes me smile. **

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><p>Dear Duncan,<p>

I hate you.

Go to Helens House.

Sincerely, Harold

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><p>Dear Harold,<p>

Nerd.

Sincerely, Duncan

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><p>Dear Duncan,<p>

Don't make me get Leshawna to beat you up again!

You know that she'll win too, because she pretty much owned you on Season 1!

So don't try it, GOSH!

Sincerely, Harold

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><p>Dear Harold,<p>

See this letter?

It's letting you know that I don't care.

Sincerely, Duncan

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><p>Dear Duncan,<p>

GOSH!

Sincerely, Harold

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><p><strong>Harold's last letter seems so in character to me. I can just imagine him writing a small letter saying 'Gosh!' to someone.<strong>


	13. Why U No Love Me?

**Because, honestly, I don't think there's a die hard Owen lover out there...**

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

You guys are kinda mean.

Every story you guys put me in, I'm either saying to Justin that I think he's amazing, or eating, or saying 'WOOHHOOOO!'.

Why aren't there more stories about me and Blaineley?

She's totally in love with me, right?

Sincerely, Owen

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><p>Dear Lardo,<p>

It's because they like me better.

Sincerely, Heather

P.S.: *Do not eat this letter*

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><p><strong>Okay, even I think that Heather's last note (her P.S.), was something Heather could say, but was a little harsh. <strong>

**...But also kinda funny to me... **


	14. Not A Pervert

**A little Chris here and there...la la la...**

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

I am not a pervert.

Why do you guys insist on pairing me with contestants?

I thought this would boost ratings, but then I come here and see Me and Lindsay, me and CHEF?

You guys are even more sick than me.

Sincerely, Chris McLean

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><p><strong>Not that goood...<strong>


	15. We're Here Too!

**Oh the interns...**

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

Why do you guys ignore us?

Or make us as Chris's sex slaves?

Because, that's just WRONG!

Sincerely, the Interns

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><p><strong>I remember a story where the interns were actually Chris's sex slaves. <strong>

**And I didn't read it.**

**Nor would I want to.**


	16. Stupid Gwen

**Tehee...**

**This is actually not my personal feelings toward Gwen, but I know that some of you may feel this way about her.**

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><p>Dear Gwen,<p>

You man stealer.

You don't deserve happiness.

Duncan is Courtney's, and you knew that!

Fall in a hole and die.

Sincerely, Gwen Haters

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><p><strong>Yep.<strong>


	17. Duncan Still Does Not Approve

**Duncan is either bi or gay in some fics...**

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

I am not gay or bi.

Deal with it.

Sincerely, Duncan

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><p><strong>Though he'd probably threaten someone, I just made it short and got to the point.<strong>


	18. The REAL New Heather

**I seriously need to update my other story. Like, legit. And I will, but writing these are freaking addicting. **

**So...maybe an update after Christmas?**

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><p>Dear Courtney,<p>

Back off.

Seriously.

Are you trying to become the new me?

'Cause, you're just being really annoying. I can see why Duncan left you.

Sincerely, Heather

P.S.: Need some ice for that burn?

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><p><strong>I seriously think that the Total Drama writers WANTED another Heather, so they made Courtney a you-know-what. Aaannd, Justin (sorta) and Alejandro were her male versions. <strong>

**But nothing can beat Season 1 Heather, even though she was so evil. **


	19. Izzy's Letter of Awesomeness

**I think all of you wanted to see an Izzy letter, so here ya go!**

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

HEHEEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHEEEE!

_Translation: You all are awesome._

Sincerely, Izzy

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><p><strong>Awwwwwwwww yeah XD<strong>


	20. WE AIN'T GONNA TELL YOU THRICE!

**I couldn't do as many updates as I wanted, with family coming over.**

**But happy hoildays everyone! **

**Have an awesome Christmas or if your Jewish, you know what hoilday you celebrate!**

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><p>Dear Fanfiction,<p>

WE AIN'T GONNA TELL YOU THRICE!

STOP MAKING US GAY WHEN WE ALL HAVE FEMALE LOVE INTERESTS!

Sincerely, the Total Drama boys

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><p>Dear Boys,<p>

We make you guys gay to fill our Yaoi needs.

DEAL WITH IT, AND WE AIN'T GONNA TELL _YOU_ THRICE!

Sincerely, Total Drama Yaoi Fans

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><p><strong>They ain't gonna tell us thrice!<strong>


	21. Who's Mary

NoCo is the biggest load of bullshit.

It's not real, and it will never be.

-Sierra

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><p>Hey yo why don't you keep your mouth shut before we get all Bruce Lee on your ass.<p>

Don't underestimate us, Sierra.

You will loose.

Just ask Mary.

-Diehard NoCo fans

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><p>...who's Mary?<p>

-Sierra

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><p>That's classified information.<p>

-Diehard NoCo fans


	22. Bitch I might have

How is there fan clubs and girls screaming that Duncan is so hot when I'm the hottest on the show?

WHY?

It doesn't make any sense!

You all suck.

-Justin

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><p>Because I've got swag that's why.<p>

-Duncan

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><p>...did you just say swag?<p>

-Justin

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><p>Bitch I might have.<p>

-Duncan


End file.
